Hello, hello!
I hope you all are well.  

My IG archive recently reminded me of the time I flew from Brisbane to NYC with a four year old and a 18 month old.  The flight was obviously long and there was not a lot of sleep to be had.  But the real killer was the jet lag. The kids weren’t in synch and so other than a few micro naps, I ended up being awake for days.
As we were all miserable, I decided to cut our city visit short and we took the train to my parents house.  
The relief I felt when I got off the train and saw my mom and dad (and could hand the still jet lagged kids over to them) was almost indescribable.  
Until I realised I had left my bag with my computer, my camera, my wallet, and our passports on the train.
Cue a total breakdown.
Thankfully we were able to race to the next station and my bag was right where I left it.

Seeing that photo immediately and viscerally brought back the complete exhaustion, desolation, desperation that I felt at that time.
And I realised that those emotions used to be a fairly constant part of my life, and that I haven’t felt that way in a while.
Part of the reason for that is simply my kids are older and have aged out of the intense neediness of very young children.
Part of the reason for that is understanding my limits.
And part of the reason for that is learning how to ask for help.

If you are exhausted, trying to figure out how to feed your newborn, wondering how something so little can create so much chaos, feeling invisible behind a mountain of laundry, please know that you are allowed to ask for help.
While we are beginning to acknowledge the experiences of pregnancy and birth, we still seem content to let mothers disappear once they have had their babies.
We should be attentive to mothers during this time, supporting them as they gain confidence in their new role, encouraging them as they learn how to ask for help.

Here are ways that I can help.
I can listen.  Please feel free to reply to this email or to give me a call and let me know how you are feeling. 
I can refer you to my colleagues.  If you need a women’s health physio, a counsellor, a lactation consultant, a paediatric osteo, I can give you the names of trusted practitioners.  And if you don’t know what you need or even if you need anything at all, refer back to the first way I can help!
I can create a mother’s group.  If you are feeling isolated and would like to connect with other mothers, I am happy to get the Zoom mother’s group going again or plan an in person mother’s group.

Take care!
And keep in touch!

Here is what’s coming up:

I have teamed up with Blossom Antenatal to offer a class for birth partners.  Practical tools any member of the team can use to support birth mothers during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.
Wednesday 15 July at 7:00pm
Wednesday 29 at 7:00pm
You can register here.

Saturday 1 August and Saturday 8 August:
IN PERSON group hypnobirthing positive birth course

Tuesday 4 August, Tuesday 11 August, Tuesday 18 August, Tuesday 25 August: 
ZOOM group hypnobirthing positive birth course

Tuesday 21 July at 7:30pm: 
FREE hypnobirthing positive birth information session
Here is the Zoom link and the password is hypnobirth.

Here are five things that might help to boost your oxytocin this week.

When I look back through the gratitude notes in my journal, definite themes have emerged these past few weeks.
Warmth – slippers, extra hot coffees, turning on the heater.
Hypnobirthing – having the opportunity to teach women and their partners about positive birth.
Holidays – both our 2018 European adventure popping up in my FB memories and the slow days of the past two weeks of school holidays.

1 – What’s your comfort movie? I could just about always watch The Sound of Music, Almost Famous, or The Devil Wears Prada.

2 – Jennifer Hudson singing Respect gives me chills…I can’t wait to see the full movie.

3 – Tacos are always a winner. I could literally wrap anything up in a tortilla, call it a taco, and the kids would eat it. So these quick and easy chicken tinga tacos are going on the menu.

4 – Amusing would-you-rathers for parents during quarantine. Would you rather boxed mac and cheese be nutritious, or Mary Poppins be real and living with you?

5 – And because my chocolate craving doesn’t seem to ever be satisfied, I have been keeping these chocolate fat bombs in the freezer. I use vanilla extract, maple syrup, leave out the essential oil, and sometimes turn them into peanut butter cups!

If you would like to get oxytocin boosters and other updates delivered directly to your inbox, you can sign up to my weekly-ish newsletter here. 
I will only ever send you information about upcoming free Zoom events and links to things that I think will make you happy.
And to be honest, before this pandemic the last time I sent an email was probably 2018, so don’t worry about me clogging up your inbox!

Hello, hello!

I hope you all are well.  
And, if you are in Brisbane, that you are staying warm!  
I have lived in some COLD places yet I have never been colder than when inside a Queenslander in winter.  Brisbane is certainly the only place I have ever lived where you have to wear more winter layers inside than you do outside!

I am realising I might need to change this newsletter’s subject to a 
monthly-ish oxytocin boost!
What has been happening with you the past few weeks?
I know some of you are waiting for your baby to arrive, some of you have been birthing babies, some of you have been celebrating first birthdays!

I have been enjoying the wonderful combination of the kids being back at school but all after school activities still being on hold.  It is so nice not to rush from school to an activity to dinner to bed.  
Despite the early-setting sun, our afternoons seem so long!  
I am assuming after school activities will be resuming next term and, even though we don’t do many, I am seriously reconsidering returning to the few that we do.

Here is what’s coming up:

Tuesday 30 June at 12:00pm: 
FREE online mother’s group.
I apologise I have missed the past few…this one is in my calendar and I am committed!
Here is the Zoom link.

Sunday 5 July and Sunday 12 July: 
IN PERSON group hypnobirthing positive birth course

Saturday 11 July and Saturday 18 July: 
ZOOM group hypnobirthing positive birth course

Tuesday 21 July at 7:30pm: 
FREE hypnobirthing positive birth information session
Here is the Zoom link and the password is hypnobirth.

Here are five things that might help to boost your oxytocin this week.

I have been finding joy in 10 minute mini yoga sessions, sitting in the sun with a steaming mug of coffee, and our new weekend  tradition of a Sunday night backyard campfire with sausages, potatoes, and s’mores!

1 – I had forgotten that Hannah Gadsby has a new Netflix special out…perhaps you forgot too? I will be tuning into Douglas tonight

2 – I seem to have lost my kitchen mojo so I am going to let Julia Busittil Nishimura in The Design Files tell me what to cook and how to cook it! Her 7 Days of Home Cooked Meals means that my meal planning is sorted.

3 – I am reading American Dirt and while the story has me completely captivated, I appreciate that it perhaps wasn’t the author’s to tell. I am going to pick my next book from one of these memoirs by writers of colour.

4 – If you are like me and have hundreds of screen shots, emails to yourself, and digital notes cluttering up your phone, the app Anygood might help. It allows you to curate all those recommendations, ideas, and reminders in beautiful folders.

5 – And because the meal plan I mentioned above doesn’t include dessert, I am going to add these Grain Free Fudge Nutty Power Brownies to the list. Hopefully they will satisfy the near constant chocolate craving that I developed during COVID!

If you would like to get oxytocin boosters and other updates delivered directly to your inbox, you can sign up to my weekly-ish newsletter here. 
I will only ever send you information about upcoming free Zoom events and links to things that I think will make you happy.
And to be honest, before this pandemic the last time I sent an email was probably 2018, so don’t worry about me clogging up your inbox!

I don’t want to share too much about this story as I don’t want to give anything away!

In some ways this birth story reminds me of my second birth…where what I had envisaged and what actually happened were two very different things!

Sometimes hypnobirths are long and calm.
And sometimes they are fast and furious!
Sometimes women use all of their techniques.
Sometimes breathing and movement (and some toilet sitting) are the only tools used.

Here is Geordie’s birth story, as written by his superstar mother, Chloe!

Our birth experience was pretty wild and amazing. Not sure if we mentioned that we had wanted to do a home birth but felt unsure so went with hospital? Well…we got our home birth!

They way I had envisioned using hypnobirthing went out the window…my carefully curated music playlists, yoga poses, affirmation…it all happened too quickly to do anything but trust my instincts and breathe!

My waters broke at 6.36pm on Tuesday 26 May.  Iain was at work so I waited for him to get home, then we went to hospital at about 7:30pm. I started having contractions pretty much immediately after my waters broke, but they were totally manageable. I was somewhat surprised though as from the very beginning they were 4 to 5 minutes apart.

Arriving at the hospital, I still felt fine and was coping really well, but the contractions were definitely starting to get stronger. We were at the hospital from 7:45pm until about 9:15pm. They checked and confirmed that my waters has broke but I declined a vaginal exam.
We had actually been at the hospital already that day to discuss induction (I was 40+2) which we had also declined, making a plan to talk again in a day or so.

So we’re at the hospital and the surges are getting stronger. Like pretty intense in that I couldn’t hide the way I had to focus and work to get though them.  But they recommended that we head home saying that I was still in early labour and it could be 3 days before we meet our baby. They did say we could stay, but we would be admitted to the ward and then not allowed to leave. 

I wanted to do as much labouring at home as I could so we agreed we would head back there as they suggested. However I did feel it was a little strange because to me, the surges were feeling really strong by now.  As we walked out of the hospital, the surges stopped me from walking and I would keel over and collapse at the knees. I think we missed an elevator or two because of it!   

I felt really sick coming home in the car as each surge continued to get stronger.
We stopped at the chemist because the midwives said we needed a thermometer.  Iain was 7 minutes inside… I know because now I was really feeling it and it was so uncomfortable in the passenger seat of my Mini.
  
We got home about 9:45pm and from then on it was intense. I couldn’t believe how full on it was especially because I thought I was only in early labour, as that’s what they told me at hospital.  So I was thinking, how the hell am I going to manage when it really ramps up? Little did I know!

I was in and out of shower, on the bed, off the bed trying to find where I felt most comfortable. By this point, my surges were 1 or 2 minutes apart. 
Iain called the hospital 3 times over about 1 hour, saying that it appeared as though I was in active labour, but they still maintained that they thought I was in early labour and said just to try to stay at home. They directed Iain to tell me to breathe through each contraction…so that’s what he was doing and that’s what I was doing.

Again I just couldn’t believe the intensity of this supposedly early labour.  I remembered earlier the midwife had said to try to sleep.  It must have been about 10:30pm and I was thinking there is no way I will sleep a wink! I couldn’t stay still. 

Despite what my intuition was telling me, I convinced myself that I was just being dramatic and believed what the midwives were telling me, that I was in early labour.
So, I tried to breathe like Iain was telling me and practice my active birth techniques. Admittedly it was quite a challenge but I managed to breathe through every surge and to keep calm.

Around 11:00pm I was in the shower again…I kept saying to Iain that the baby was coming and that I felt an urge to push. He was like “No don’t push, just breathe babe it’s not time yet, you’ve got this!”
So I resisted the urge to push. It wasn’t so much an urge to push I guess but rather I felt something moving through me.

I got out of the shower and went to go to bed, but then suddenly decided to sit on the toilet.  I think I thought that if it wasn’t a baby it must be a poo!
I sat down for not even  half a second…and then…Geordie started to crown! I hadn’t even pushed.

I felt with my hand and said to Iain, “I can feel his head!” I asked him to look, and he confirmed it was our baby’s head. Then I asked him to call an ambulance. He ran to get his phone which was just a few meters away and when he turned around, Geordie was in my arms! Iain didn’t even get a chance to dial 000. 

I caught Geordie in my hands as I stood up off the toilet.  I knew he was coming and suddenly thought I didn’t want him to land it the toilet so I stood up and that was it!
He was born at 11:36pm.  Exactly 5 hours to the minute after my waters broke. 

So after we had thought about having a home birth but out of fear decided to go with the hospital, Geordie decided he wanted to be born at home. It was meant to be!

It wasn’t scary at all. Especially the part when he was actually born.  I felt really calm and it was pretty bloody amazing.  We’re still in awe over it.

We did call the paramedics shortly after and they arrived straight away. They were great.  They did suggest on arrival to give me the drug to get my placenta out but I declined and requested some time for it to happen naturally as well as up to an hour to breastfeed and have skin to skin. They were happy to wait and very patient. Geordie took to the boob pretty quickly and enjoyed his first feed for quite a while.
The placenta didn’t come while we were at home.

At 1:00am we headed off to the hospital in the ambulance.  
On arrival the midwives said the doctor would be coming in soon and would suggest that I have the drug to help birth my placenta.  I said I didn’t want that and they warned me that I could end up in surgery to have it taken out if I didn’t. I didn’t appreciate that they made me feel afraid.
One midwife left the room and the the other suggested I sit on the toilet.  So I did and 3 minutes later out came the placenta. 

Ultimately we got the exact birth experience we had hoped for. No drugs, no interventions, and a beautiful healthy baby.  
I only lost about 30ml of blood during birth, had no tearing, and, upon checking later, next to no abdominal separation. 

We checked ourselves out of the hospital at 11:00am. They wanted me to stay until at least 7:00pm to continue to monitor my gestational diabetes but I declined.  Geordie had 3 blood sugar tests already all of which were perfect so we didn’t think it was necessary.  I never really believed I had GDM anyway because my BGL were always low while I was pregnant, despite apparently testing positive.

So that was that!
What a magical experience and what a whirlwind. It was truly wonderful and we could not have dreamed for a better outcome.

Hello!

I hope your weekend was full of both figurative and literal warmth.  Nice people, good food, happy times, Uggs, and extra blankets!

I taught hypnobirthing all weekend…no matter how many times I teach the course, it always feels like such a privilege to meet excited women and their partners and help them prepare for a positive birth.
And we had friends over on Saturday night for a backyard camping style cook out…sausages, potatoes, and of course s’mores.  It is something we have been doing a lot of lately and it was SO nice to be able to share the experience with friends!

I hope you all have a really good week!

For me a good week will be a productive week!  
The kids are back at school and I am excited to tackle my very neglected to do list.

Speaking of my to do list, as I mentioned in my last newsletter, I am collaborating on a project where we are attempting to prove the worth of a positive birth. 
And I would love your help!
Really any feedback would be appreciated…and you don’t have to have taken hypnobirthing with me to be involved.
Your birth story and what was positive about it.
Your partner’s version of your birth story and what was positive about it for them.
And how you think your positive birth went on to impact things like becoming a parent, advocating for your child, your relationship with your partner.
Thank you!

Here is what’s coming up on Zoom:

Weekly Mother’s Group – Tuesdays at 12:00pm
Conversation and connection. 
Access to wonderful women’s health practitioners.
And mothers to be are welcome too!

Pregnancy Choices Webinar – Wednesday 3 June at 7:00pm
This is another one for those who aren’t pregnant yet or who are newly pregnant.  We will chat about models of care and how the decisions you make early in pregnancy can have major impacts on your birth.

Here are five things that might help to boost your oxytocin this week.

It’s funny how putting this newsletter together has become something that boosts MY oxytocin!
Hooray for connection!

1 – Noor is a recipe developer in the Ottolenghi test kitchen (hello dream job…actually my dream job would be TASTER in the test kitchen). Anyway, her IG feed is full of delicious inspiration. First up for me, the smooshed carrots, the hawaij onion and chickpea soup, and the salted pecan, marshmallow, and lime bars! How about you?

2 – Over the past few weeks, we would celebrate finishing home learning for the day by watching Lego Masters together. But now that it is finished, we need something to fill the void. I think Taika Waititi and friends reading James and the Giant Peach is going to be perfect.

3 – I love this question. What are life’s true luxuries and pleasures? And I love reading all the replies. For me, a very long, very hot shower, eating perfectly ripe fruit straight from the vine or tree, and the feel of little warm bodies snuggled next to me.

4 – Fudgy Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream Pretzel Cake. I am bookmarking this to make for my birthday (which is not until November…but it never hurts to plan ahead).

5 – Colin Hay and Delta Goodrem singing Down Under…so good.

If you would like to get oxytocin boosters and other updates delivered directly to your inbox, you can sign up to my weekly-ish newsletter here. 
I will only ever send you information about upcoming free Zoom events and links to things that I think will make you happy.
And to be honest, before this pandemic the last time I sent an email was probably 2018, so don’t worry about me clogging up your inbox!

Sammy is a NICU nurse while knowledge is power, sometimes too much knowledge can work against us. Throughout her pregnancy she worked on compartmentalising her experiences at work and focusing instead on a positive birth.

As her pregnancy went past 40 weeks and then beyond 41 weeks, she found herself getting anxious and made a fully informed decision that an induction was the best way forward for her.

And she was able to work with her caregivers, her partner, and her self to have a positive induction!

This story is a beautiful testament to what a positive birth actually entails…and that is feeling informed, feeling supported, and feeling safe.

Congratulations Sammy and Reuben and welcome beautiful Lottie!

Here is her birth story, in her own words.

My birth definitely did not go to plan but I used all my hypnobirthing tools to keep calm and focused throughout.

I had a dream of waking in the middle of the night in labour and labouring at home for hours before breathing my baby out while kneeling in a calm, dimly lit birth suite with my favourite music in the back ground…what I actually got was a 32 hour labour, epidural, and narrowly avoided a c-section.

But I still feel so positive about my whole experience. 

I found myself being induced at 41+2 weeks. While I really didn’t want to be induced I had to balance my fear around the induction with my fear around being overdue. 

The plan for induction was to have a balloon catheter placed in the evening, membranes ruptured the next morning.
I desperately wanted to avoid the syntocinon drip. I was told I could have 2 hours after breaking my waters to see if labour began before needing to start the IV. They basically told me as a first time mum it was highly unlikely to happen without the synthetic hormones but did support me to try. 

I got the balloon on Thursday at 5:00pm, it was not as uncomfortable as I thought. The midwives told me to sleep and I’d be taken to Birth Suite at 6:00am to have my waters broken.
I started having regular surges every 5 minutes within about an hour of the balloon being placed. They progressed to every 3 minutes through the night. I was breathing through them and managed to get about 45 minutes sleep. 

Birth suite was busy the next morning so I wasn’t taken down until midday. By now, the balloon catheter was uncomfortable. I couldn’t bend down and was having trouble peeing from the pressure of it. However it did its job as I was 4cm when they took it out and broke my waters.
I was told I had to go back upstairs until I started the syntocinon but thankfully my surges immediately became very intense, every 2 to 3 minutes.

I spent the next 5 hours in the shower and then the bath. I felt amazing, I was breathing through the surges. I had music in the background and birth affirmations running through my head. The surges were so strong but I was so calm, my husband and midwives didn’t know when I was having them and I was falling asleep in between.

However I began to get severe back and pelvic pain between surges, it was almost more painful than the surges and I could not get relief. I had been vomiting for hours, doubts were creeping into my mind about how much longer I could do this for.
I thought I was in transition.

I had to get out of the bath to pee and get checked at 5.30pm. The pain became unmanageable and I began to panic. My baby had flipped posterior during my labour, I was still only 4cm.
I begged for an epidural.

My obstetrician came in at this point and explained to me that my baby wasn’t moving through my pelvis. My options were for a c-section or an epidural with high dose syntocinon to try to move her to the correct position. 

They somehow got an IV and epidural into me while I rocked on the bed and sucked the gas like a crazy woman – we were 24 hours in, I couldn’t keep down any food or fluid and I had definitely lost my cool at this point.
My wonderful husband tried so hard to bring me back to a state of calm and once the epidural began working, we managed to get there.

They gave me a few hours for the epidural and synto to do their jobs. They kept losing the trace of her heartbeat on the monitor which was frightening. By 1:00am we had to make the call whether to go to theatre or push.

Just before this I began to panic, I had a feeling something terrible was going to happen to my baby and I said I just wanted to go to theatre and get her out safely. Maybe this was transition.
My OB did a check and I was fully dilated. I managed to push her out in 45 minutes with no vacuum or forceps required.
I used the mirror during pushing, I thought I’d hate it but it was the most amazing thing to see her head emerge! She was a little Superman baby, coming out with her hand on her face. 

Our preferences for immediately after birth were upheld and we were able to do delayed cord clamping, uninterrupted skin to skin, and the room was dark and quiet while we got to know our baby. 

It was not what I imagined but it was so incredible and the hypnobirthing techniques got us through some very challenging moments.

I also want to mention that Reuben was absolutely amazing for my whole labour. He incorporated all of the techniques he had learned, helped me to stay calm, reminded me to relax, and just knew what I needed. I know I could not have gotten through it without him. He complained a lot about having to spend two Saturdays at birth classes but I know he gained a lot from it and realises now it was so worth it!

Thank you so much again Caitlin for your course and everything you taught us! I highly recommend hypnobirthing to everyone who will listen to me!